Friday, August 27, 2010
Even a few months back I could not have believed that someone like me can have such a change of mind. I used to enjoy reading love stories and watching movies of the same genre. For those brief time spans I would be transformed to the leading lady who is coincidentally very beautiful (both inside and outside) and some random guy would be my prince charming. And by the way even he is supposed to be dashing with a terrific sense of humour. He says he loves me from the very moment he had first set his eyes on me but also clarifies that I am (undoubtedly) the best thing that has ever happened to him. Which means that he (thinks) he loves me because of the kind of person I am but actually I happen to be the hottest girl he has ever met? How ironic can that possibly be!!
Needless to say that throughout my teenage (which is not over yet) I kept on believing that someday someone will come. I kept on thinking about it till I realized that I had been too naive to try and differentiate between fiction and fact. My ignorance had left quite a bad taste since I have had sky high expectations about people whom I thought I was in love with. I have been verbally molested and my self respect has been put to question numerous times.Every time I found myself contemplating about it I questioned-“Did I really deserve this?” Whenever things did not turn out quite right I would go back to thinking about my dream man and imagine about his reactions IF he would have been by my side. The fact remains that most of such thoughts are an extension of my personality. That is I want my life partner to react in a manner similar to mine which is actually NOT possible.
I find myself growing out of the concept of Love for reasons I am not quite sure of. I have become cynical and impatient and I hate to see myself like this. I am not desperate but I feel that life could have been much simpler if I could share it with someone. Someone with whom I can laugh and cry someone who could put me at ease no matter what. It feels enormously frustrating to keep things bottled up, to fake a smile even if you feel like bursting into tears. By Love I don’t mean by running around trees or talking on the phone for hours, Love is to understand and to be understood. Love cannot be demanded, you either have it or you don’t. Love is pragmatic and inspiring; I can’t merge Love into romanticism because Love is in being responsible and honest. Like Erich Segal had famously said-“Love means never having to say you are sorry.” because when you look into the eyes of the lover and see those tears whom he profusely tries to hide you realize that you could not have had things done otherwise.
Monday, August 23, 2010
By now everyone(I mean most of them)in college knows that I am a sentimental bloke.I start crying even during the screenings of Planet Earth!!Anything which is remotely kind or passionate puts my tear glands to work then and there.I cry while reading books,watching movies,sharing a sad affair of my life with my friend and the list simply goes on and on.The first time I held a roadside puppy in my arms I cried,when I am very happy I cry.Its more of a routine now and I just can't do away with it,somehow.
For me shedding tears does not epitomize weakness,instead it helps me be myself for a change.It helps me connect to myself,understand myself better.There is nothing wrong in having an outburst of emotions,I mean it is just a part of life.I seriously despise people who think crying is a feminine phenomenon.I believe when a man is truly in love he cries,it makes him realize that he has finally found that someone whom he just cannot do without.Personally I can't bear the thought of people bothering me when I cry.These are the times I like being left alone because the people approaching me, do the needful out of pity and sympathy rather than concern.
It might sound weird,but I love crying.It cleans my eyes(:P)and helps me explore the human in me.Crying puts me at ease when I am terribly sad or utterly disgusted.Its almost therapeutic.So my advice to everyone remains that crying is the best way to heal all wounds hence cry if and when you want.Stop being conscious of the people around because they might mock you but somewhere down the line every jerk cries for something or the other.Feel free and don't let anyone's presence hamper your emotional needs and wants.Quoting Golda Meir-"Those who do not know how to weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either."
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Independence Day??Is it different from any other day???Obviously it is!It a holiday for heaven's sake.A holy-day when we are meant to relax,hang out(!)with friends and do a host of other things except for realizing that Freedom is not actually not what we think it is. Freedom is not in having booze how and when you want just because you are not a minor anymore. Freedom is not in criticizing your country and your Government because you think they are useless.I mean seriously dude,look at yourself first.We are living in a country where we still find a mother selling her own child for a handful of rice, a husband torturing her wife just because she won't let him waste her earnings on liquor.And we find a bunch of rich brats who can insensitively comment-"Indian Music...ewwwww....I like Megadeth and Cradle Of Filth".If we are so dependent on western culture then how can we possibly think that we are the members of an Independent nation. A girl child being forced into marriage instead of completing her education is not what I call Freedom.A landlord sleeping with the farmer's wife in order to reduce his taxes is not being free.
The obvious question remains what is FREEDOM then?In spite of our country's progress why doesn't it do away with age old norms which do nothing but deter our course to becoming what our forefathers had dreamt for us? Freedom is in taking responsibility for the cause one truly believes.Freedom is in being brave not proud, courageous but not haughty. Freedom is in standing up and fighting for one's rights. Freedom lies in individuality and not in selfishness.As the youth of the Nation which prides in being able to hold up its traditions for years across we have to understand that if want to bring a change, we have to work for it first.As they say-"Be the change you want to see". The Government is doing what it can, but as citizens of INDIA we ought to take an initiative too.It can be anything starting from teaching your maid's daughter to cleaning the park near your house.If we as individuals take control then I believe nothing will ever be impossible.Quoting Dwight D. Eisenhower-"Freedom has its life in the hearts, the actions, the spirit of men and so it must be daily earned and refreshed - else like a flower cut from its life-giving roots, it will wither and die.".......