Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Whose Fault is it anyway??
“I remember falling off the road while walking, with a sudden thud. My friend tried to catch hold of me but it was already too late, too late for me choose a different lane or even think of standing up for myself. He did what he had to and within a snap of a second that scum of a guy was gone. He almost vanished into the thin air after scarring me for life.”
As a fourteen year old I was clueless about my next move. “Should I report to the police or talk to my mom first?”-I wondered. But due to a sudden upturn of events I ended up doing nothing really to make myself feel better. Letting my mom know about it would mean that she would become sad and over protective about me which I obviously did not want. And the police possibly could have ignored me as a precocious little chap, trying to make my presence felt. So, I tried to forget about that incident. Although I failed miserably, some questions came up which made me try and see things in a different light altogether.
In spite of being a hardcore feminist I tried to think about the person who allegedly tried to take advantage of my situation. Somehow I felt that there is a story behind the making every accused, every criminal. I mean think about it, even the ones who proclaim that they do “It” just for fun must have their own reasons to invade someone’s personal space. Anything or anyone like a super nagging ex-girlfriend who never really liked him and chose someone else over him because he just wasn’t “Man” enough. The guy is enraged and because he can’t obviously do anything to change the past he goes and abuses a random girl to prove that himself to someone who obviously doesn’t give a damn anyways. The role of the girlfriend is passed on to family members (brother, mother, father) or a “Close” buddy from time to time. However although no one notices, the extent of damage caused is beyond measure. And the only justified way of taking all that anger and frustration out is to harm an unknown person whose life just never remains the same again. In the end, No one really cares, except for the guy who does not regret his decision but is not happy either. The girl cries her way to sleep wakes up in the middle of the night and does not feel at ease with a male company for a long time (even if it does not show on her face).
So what could possibly be the solution or is there any solution at all? If we were to stop this thing, the initiative must begin at a nascent stage but mostly we are not in control of the kind of people we meet and who influence us (knowingly or unknowingly). Let’s face it, we humans are not even remotely close to perfect, we let the wrong people hurt us and after that we don’t know what to do. However, it does not mean that we can’t try. I am not saying that self control comes easy but it is worth the effort. If we start reciprocating hatred then what is the need of commitments and relationships anyways? Lastly we should take chances, in love, life and relationships and try and forgive people no matter what their fault is. “To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”